Episode 14 - Lessons in love

Robert had only just opened the shop next morning when Gareth Morgan swept in waving the morning paper.

"Have you seen this, boyo?" he blurted out, pointing to a photo of Magda Kelly heading an appeal for anyone who had seen the accident to come forward. "Isn't that the wife of that Kelly bloke? The one who always charges so much for his potatoes?"

Robert pretended not to know about the accident, looked cursorily at the photo and asked Mr Morgan what it was to him.

"Well, don’t tell anyone, but I'd been seeing her," he said.

Robert was astonished. Was Gareth Morgan finally growing up? Not that he would have chosen that kind of initiation. Robert thought he would make a few inquiries.

"What do you mean - 'seeing her'? She was a married woman."

"But unhappy. She told me everything."

Did she now, thought Robert. He had known Gareth Morgan was naive, but now it seemed that he was oblivious to what Magda Kelly had done for extra pocket money. Gareth tried to explain.

"Well, to tell the truth, I didn't want to erm disappoint Phyllis. It seemed like a golden opportunity."

"So you were getting advice from Magda Kelly, were you?"

"Advice? No, not just advice. The other, boyo..... It was a kind of emotional awakening, Mr Jones. She really bowled me over."

Robert thought Magda Kelly had earned he fee if she had contrived to bowl Gareth Morgan over, and she had probably charged him plenty for her favours, though he was unlikely to admit it or even know what he was paying for.

Gareth blushed at the thought of his erotic experiences with Magda, the first he'd ever had with anyone, including Phyllis, who was to reap the benefit of this ‘schooling’. And Magda Kelly really had showed him the ropes. He was deeply embarrassed at his own boldness. He shifted from one foot to the other and started perspiring heavily.

Robert decided to take a sympathetic line.

"No need to be ashamed, lad," he said in a low, conspiratorial voice. "She was a professional, you know."

"I know that now. I read it in the newspaper. I didn't know it at the time. I thought she fancied me. I would never have…"

"Why not, Gareth? People go to experts for advice all the time. There's nothing wrong in that," said Robert in comforting tones. Then he sharpened a carving knife at the other end of the counter to divert attention from the laughter that quelled up as he heard Gareth raving about Magda's - and his own charms.

"It was worth every penny," he shouted above the swishes of the sharpening steel.

Robert decided the knife was sharp enough. Gareth Morgan's words seemed to echo around the shop. Gareth didn’t know that Gloria was in the back room rinsing the trays before arranging fresh cuts of meat on them for the display, except that she was eavesdropping.

She dropped a metal tray. Morgan heard the clatter and was horrified at the idea that Phyllis, whom he had been working towards, might have heard him shouting. Then he remembered that Phyllis was at home in bed with a sore throat. So who was in the back room?

"Magda spoke to me at the bistro and I thought she liked me," he stuttered, and despite a mysterious person being within hearing distance, revealed all or nearly all - now he had embarked on the sorry tale. Robert thought he would ask Cleo if she knew what Delilah thought about Magda Kelly’s recruitment action.

"She probably did like you, Gareth lad", said Robert.

"Then she said we should go somewhere more private, so I gave Delilah a wink and she let us go upstairs to the guestroom. And then…"

So Delilah knew and might have been amused, thought Robert. Shame on her. Not wanting to be subjected to any toe-curling details of Gareth's erotic encounters, Robert told him it all was all right. He didn’t need to know any details.

"But you should not tell anyone," Robert advised, "unless you want to get mixed up in the case."

Mr Morgan jumped. What if the papers got hold of his adventures with Magda Kelly? They would make a meal of them.

"What case?"

Robert realised he had startled Gareth.

"Well, if they're looking for witnesses, they must think there's a hit and run driver involved," he said.

"But I was erm practising," Gareth said.

"Practising what?" The use of that word was rather unfortunate in the circumstances.

"In church. The organ."

"Oh, that's what you were doing” said Robert, stifling the urge to laugh again. “Do you have witnesses?"

"I don't know," Gareth Morgan replied, almost in tears. "Edith, perhaps. She often listens in secretly to my playing."

There was a note of pride in Mr Morgan’s voice despite his distress about Magda.

Robert was surprised. Did Edith creep into the church to listen secretly? Was Gareth Morgan a sort of village Casanova? Surely not, and Edith was unlikely to have an ulterior motive.

"She doesn't know that I know she comes to listen," he said. "I think she's a bit sweet on me."

Robert found it necessary to sharpen another carving knife. There was seemingly no end to the guy's vanity, despite the predicament he was now in. Gareth Morgan was very mixed up indeed.

"Well, I shouldn't worry any more, Gareth. What's done is done."

"But how can I face my mother?" he wailed.

"Why do you have to tell her?" said Robert, hard put not to laugh out loud, so absurd was the situation.

"When were you last together with Magda Kelly?" he asked quietly, preferring a tactful euphemism to describe what he concluded were rather dingy exploits.

"About 2 weeks ago," Morgan admitted.

"That's history, Gareth lad," said Robert. "I shouldn't think any more about it."

"But…"

"No buts."

"Honestly?"

"Well, you might have Kelly to contend with when… if he finds out."

That alarmed Mr Morgan nearly as much as the newspaper article. Robert felt like giving himself a pat on the back for thinking of that.

"You won't tell him, will you, Mr Jones?"

"Of course not, but I'd advise you to get out of town for a while."

"I was going to anyway. I wanted to ask you how much notice you needed for the flat?"

Robert couldn't believe his luck. Gloria eavesdropped with baited breath, waiting for Robert's answer.

"None at all, lad. If you want to get back to Wales out of reach of Mr Kelly, then off you go."

"But the rent…"

"Never mind that. I'll soon find someone for the flat."

Gloria blew kisses in Robert’s direction.

Robert felt a momentary twinge of conscience, but it was a solution sent from heaven and he was not going to jeopardise it.

"When do you want to go, Gareth?" he asked.

"Saturday. My mates can only come on a Saturday."

"Well, Saturday it is, then."

"I can't thank you enough," said Gareth, stumbling backwards out of the shop.

"Don't mention it," called Robert, relieved that he wasn't expected to actually operate the removal back to Wales. He wouldn't even have to bribe him to go.

Robert was finding it hard to be sorry for Mr Morgan, given that he wanted him out of the flat anyway. The organist’s personal situation, the conceited little man who thought a woman like Magda Kelly would view him as more than a potential customer. and  Gareth’s mother’s disapproval of anything Gareth might feel bound to confess, mixed in with the joy of having her son back, were no concern of his.

"I'll ask Phyllis to go to Wales with me," said Mr Morgan, popping his head back round the door. "We'll make a fresh start. She'll get on well with Mother."

Robert would have liked to say something, but didn’t. On no account did he want Gareth Morgan to change his mind about going home.

Mr Morgan revved up his old Morris Minor, that was parked in the shop’s forecourt when he hadn’t had time to park it in the garage that went with the flat over the shop. Was he really going to find Phyllis and invite her to Wales?

Robert hoped Phyllis was in bed with a sore throat rather than Mr Universe, but he doubted it. Gareth was in for a big surprise if he thought Phyllis would entertain the idea of visiting his mother In Wales.

***

Gloria came into the shop laughing and arranged the trays in the display. She could ask Robert when she could move in. On the other hand, that would reveal that she had been eavesdropping. She would wait for Robert to say something.

"Well, Gloria, I notice you were listening in. The problem is solved."

Gloria looked startled. She did not know that her movements had been reflected in the mirror on the open door dividing the shop from the back room. He would keep that observation to himself. It had been useful in the past.

"Well, I…. I only heard the end of the little drama," she said. "I couldn't very well interrupt, now could I?"

"Of course not, Gloria."

"So that woman in the accident was the local hooker Cleo was talking about."

"It looks like it. But Delilah won't be pleased to know her bistro has been used for soliciting."

"I'm sure she knows that, Robert. You can't stop it happening. I expect she was amused."